The noob moments...

[Clone155]

Well, I had a head start on the two of you, I had found out cannons did more damage than MG's am .50's did more than .303's, or 7.62mm. When I first saw those my reaction was "Who the hell puts 8 303's on a fighter?"

Are you saying you were a better noob than I was? lol

[Nemisis]

No, I'm saying I knew the differenc between weapons. But I thought "rpg" indicated the rate of fire, and so I always took the lighter load when avalable.

[Wagger]

Oh the joy of finding out you have enough perk points to take a Me-262.  This was going to be the day that I would slash through my enemies and wreak havoc upon them.  I sat on the runway with my engines at full power, brakes on.  Then I started my roll down the runway picking up speed and anticipating the big moment when I would lift off into the skies.  It was about that time that the barge, you know the one that comes all the way into shore then continues on to the airfield over land, crossed the runway right in front of me. Well the next thing you know I'm in the tower watching this stupid barge continue across the airfield.   

[TinmanX]

I thought drop tanks were a special kind of ordinance that would drop - or kill - tanks. I spent the better part of a day dropping my externals on GV's. The frustration of not scoring a single kill all bloody day finally got to me and I asked on local vox "How do you aim the drop tanks?".

Much mirth and merriment en-sewed.

[Wreked]

Awhile ago in a WB S3 event - my 1st S3 ever and my 1st mission ever with my new squad JG27.

On station in formation at 32k - fumbling around watching guages / listening to orders/course changes on TS / trying to stay on station with my wingie / keeping an eye out for the B17 stream or the hordes of P51s reported to be escorting them and...........

....resting my hand on the keyboard - "Enter Enter Enter"...WHA??!!!

..in silk at 32K watching my 190 spiral down pilotless and my squad disappearing into a cloud bank.

I don't know what was worse - the 32k float to earth or the SILENCE from my squad mates!!!  LOL

....cheers eh!

[Mister Fork]

In the AvA while I'm dog fighting two Zero's in my P-38G and my wife has the gaul to walk by clothless.  Distracted, I ended up getting one of the guys on my six who puts holes in my right wing fuel tank.  no bigie - I extend and re-engage and swap over fuel tanks.

2 minutes later, she walks by again.  This time the guy in the green Zero hits my left engine and it starts to smoke with an oil hit.  Again, no biggie.

Moments later, another walk and she pauses to bend over to pick up something from the floor.

I flying right into sea.

Darn those clothless walk-by's with bendovers.  Ruined my dog fight.




 

[Bear76]

In the AvA while I'm dog fighting two Zero's in my P-38G and my wife has the gaul to walk by clothless.  Distracted, I ended up getting one of the guys on my six who puts holes in my right wing fuel tank.  no bigie - I extend and re-engage and swap over fuel tanks.

2 minutes later, she walks by again.  This time the guy in the green Zero hits my left engine and it starts to smoke with an oil hit.  Again, no biggie.

Moments later, another walk and she pauses to bend over to pick up something from the floor.

I flying right into sea.

Darn those clothless walk-by's with bendovers.  Ruined my dog fight.




 

We need film to confirm this

[ToeTag]

First squad bomber mission They said take out the VH. I assumed it meant VHF (radar tower).  I bombed with out the bomb sights...cause I didn't know my ju 88 had one and missed the VH buy a mile.  Squadies not to impressed. 

It was my 3rd year playing when a squadie finally told me you could use your zoom view in the main gun of the tank to enlarge the picture and see what you where shooting at.  Before that I was sooting at pixles on my screen.  Oddly enough I did get a few kills at the old tank town. 

My first 234 flight ended with collision into terrain.  The funny part was one of my squadies was an airline pilot and was right behind me watching....he knew I was a noob and going to die.  His comments on vox were beep beep beep your too low ....pull up pull up.  It sounded exactly like the audible warning on an airliner.  Was funny.

262's  I could write a book.....cliff notes version they are too fast and to fragile.  I still don't fly them but maybe twice a year.

[68ZooM]

lol we had a squaddie (the only squeeker) and we was doing a special event, We was told to spawn on the runway but dont launch, we all proceed to lineup and get ready and guess what? the squeeker pulls his gun trigger  and kills like 10 of us just sitting there,  that was priceless, thought the poor kid was going to cry cause he knew we were all pissed lol

[Skulls22]

Squad decides to a 262 run... We spawn 6 x 262's on the runway..


Knights win the war... 6 262's die in their ack.. LOL

Knights won a war????

[skidoo33]

After reading some of these stories, I don't feel nearly as bad about myself anymore.  Thanks for the laughs.

[gpwurzel]

First flight ever, upped a Spit, gained a little altitude, saw a countryman was being trailed by multiple bad guys, flew in and waxed 3 in 1 swoop....., errr, what actually happened is I managed to get fast enough to compress the spit, flew right between countryman and bad guys, and made a lovely crater right on the beach 


Oddly enough, countryman made it home, think the bad guys were too busy laughing at me......


Wurzel

[Nemisis]

Oh the joy of finding out you have enough perk points to take a Me-262.  This was going to be the day that I would slash through my enemies and wreak havoc upon them.  I sat on the runway with my engines at full power, brakes on.  Then I started my roll down the runway picking up speed and anticipating the big moment when I would lift off into the skies.  It was about that time that the barge, you know the one that comes all the way into shore then continues on to the airfield over land, crossed the runway right in front of me. Well the next thing you know I'm in the tower watching this stupid barge continue across the airfield.   

Same damn thing happened the first time I upped a tiger. I upped right in the middle of a rook CV attack on a knit base.

[Bear76]

First day in the TA many years ago, flying my pretty Hog around with my mouse. I'm trying to figure things out as I read the help pages I have all typed up in a 3 ring folder. Suddenly I hear over the radio "Ace under attack". So I figure I have to find Ace and save him. I fly here, I fly there. None of the green icons say "Ace". Finally I type on the green text, where the hell is Ace at? I can't find him anywhere?
Much laffing, hoots, snickers, and of course the obligatory "what a noob". Someone finally PM's me and tells me it's not "Ace under attack" it's "Base under attack". I took a few days off before I went back hoping the guys forgot about it. Nope

[Nemisis]

Hell, not as bad as thinking DT's kill tanks....  I mean it is pretty hard to understand if you never heard it before.