EVIL Minds only, Please.....

[AAJagerX]

Just thought of one.  Go buy a scorpion.  Leave it on the table in it's little plastic cage.  Put a fresh cigar in the cage and leave a note saying....  "If you want it THAT bad, be my guest." 

He'll get the message, and you get a pet scorpion!  It's a win-win.

[DREDIOCK]

Treat the drawing end of a new cigar with thishttp://www.hotsauceworld.com/357maddoghot.html and precut the smoking end so the idiot doesn't get confused.  Either that or install a maglock on you gate that you can power from inside that house and call the cops for a possible home invasion.

Yep, Lacing the tip with hot sauce was my first thought.

He's proboby taking them to make bunts. Emptying out the tabacco and filling it with pot.

I LOVE busting the kids chops in stores when I see em buying the things. Couple of weeks ago I was in a store when I saw this kid (early 20s to me is a kid) complaining to the store owner about what he was charging for those cheap cigars. I told him "Yanno your just goingot fill the damn thing up with weed. Papers are alot cheaper and you dont have to smoke the tobacco with it"

He looked at me like I lost my mind then shook his head and said "No"

So I said "Well then dont fluff'n whine about how much they cost"


BTW any Cops here. If you see a young kid (late teens early 20's) smoking a cigar Odds are it aint just a cigar. Not many late teen /early 20 year olds that smoke cigars. Get yourself an easy bust.

Anyone that stupid deserves to get caught

[DREDIOCK]

BTW instead of hot sauce. pick up some parrot food. alot of em come with dried jalapenos Which parrots love.

Crush it down to a fine powder then dampen the tip and sprinkles some on.
BTW either wear gloves when handling them. or thoroughly wash your hands afterwords. I used to have an African gray parrot and made that mistake twice after feeding him. First time I was eating the bottom of a bag of potato chips. Not quite the flavor I was expecting. LOL

Second time I had an itch in the corner of my eye...Not nearly as much fun

[flight17]

These are too funny...

[flight17]

Ok here is what I would do.

First, film him in the act a couple of nights. This gives your proof and sets up your AFV winning video along with the video you will send into the local News Station.

Find a police officer you know or one that one of your friends know and bring him into the loop. If you can make a case, ask if you can make a sting operation to catch him. If you don’t have a case, ask if you could at least get their help to teach him a lesson. 

Now ill take Babalonian's second plan for use and tweak it.

You will need:
*Three friends, a couple of cops in police cars, a van, multiple cameras and robbers costumes and a baseball bat/fake gun or real one (unloaded) and hammer?

Setup: place the cameras around your property so you can capture multiple views of the act. Have the van sitting right by your house from late afternoon on until the sting but make sure it is out of direct site of your neighbors house so the get-away driver can get to it without being seen. Find out what time he comes at so you know when to start preparing for the sting. An hour before the sting, have the police officer in the patrol car arrive nearby out of sight but in direct site of the van.

The plan:
Get someone to do your routine for you. You and three friends will “Rob” your house while he is on your porch.

One friend will be in the van as the get-away driver sitting  waiting. After your neighbor enters your yard, you and your friends will go out and enter behind him acting like your about to rob the place. As soon as you guys start in, the driver will start the van and start creeping up. When he sees you guys, you turn and run and jump in the van and speed off. Mean while when the van starts the police officers also start their cars and follow up. Just as the van leaves your house the cops should turn on the lights and pull up to your house and “arrest” your neighbor. If you want to actually press charges (if you have a case) then they can actually haul him in. If not, then they can just hackle him for a bit then let him go.

Meanwhile, you have the film of all of this, so you make a very good video of it. Send it in to America’s funniest home videos and also to your local news station. Hopefully the news station will run it and make a big deal out of it…

Oh and remember to put it on Youtube and post it here

[ZetaNine]

hrmm....either he reads this board...or he's lost his taste for my cigars.  Left a whole one out last night just to keep him interested...it's still sitting there at midnight the next day.

I'm thinking about getting two of those FLIP recorders, because they are small as hell and apparently take 4 hours of video.  I have a window that somewhat looks onto the courtyard if I position it right..and a window directly over the gate that I can shoot downward. 

The cigar waits..while the master bates.

[Tupac]

hide somewhere in the courtyard, when he comes through the gate yell "ON GUARD" and zap him with a cattle prod.




Or leave a note on the door that your wife wrote looking like a list of things to do
1. Drop of kids at school.
2. Get dog food
3. Buy Jockstrap
4. Get herpes check
5. Blood test to see how rapidly your AIDS is progressing



Honestly, I like the first one more, but either of them would make him not want to come back.
 

[fbWldcat]

hide somewhere in the courtyard, when he comes through the gate yell "ON GUARD" and zap him with a cattle prod.




Or leave a note on the door that your wife wrote looking like a list of things to do
1. Drop of kids at school.
2. Get dog food
3. Buy Jockstrap
4. Get herpes check
5. Blood test to see how rapidly your AIDS is progressing



Honestly, I like the first one more, but either of them would make him not want to come back.

Hepatitis A, Mono, Swine Flu, Herpes, HIV, Typhoid. The list goes on and on 
 

[DREDIOCK]

hide somewhere in the courtyard, when he comes through the gate yell "ON GUARD" and zap him with a cattle prod.

   

[Maniac]

Just put the cigar up your arse and leave it there for him to smoke.

[1pLUs44]

Next time he does it, spray his bellybutton with mace and say you thought it was an intruder. I'm pretty sure he'll learn his lesson and it's not life threatening. 

[texastc316]

Hell, just change your routine, leave the porch light on.
Then buy a boa constricter and a .30-06

[oneway]

I cant wait and hope the OP posts the results of taking to heart the lame high school pranks posted in this thread...
He is going to be sued six ways to Sunday...

At this stage of the game, it will be fair to laugh out loud when he loses his house...

Go for it...dip the cigar in pepper oil...

I dare you....

Out

Oneway

[fbWldcat]

Hell, just change your routine, leave the porch light on.
Then buy a boa constricter and a .30-06

Just go out acting like a screaming deranged idiot swinging around a pellet rifle (high powered of course). And ask WHO GOES THERE!?

The kid is on his property anyway, what harm can it do to at least confront him in his own yard? Oneway?

[Nemisis]

Provided he doesn't harm the kid, he should be fine as far as legal issues. Oh sure, the kids parents will hate his guts like rat poision, but personally, I wouldn't want the affections of someone who rasies a kid like that.



BRING BACK THE PADDLE!!!!!!


Honesly, its about the only think I can think of that would teach some of these kids. The don't give a damn about grades, or the law, so long as they don't end up in jail. And half of their parents don't care from what I've seen.