« previous next »
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4 5 ... 8   Go Down

Author Topic: Norris'ism  (Read 6183 times)

Offline MachFly

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 6296
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #15 on: July 26, 2010, 05:51:12 PM »
Some people wear Darth Vader costume for Halloween, Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris costume.
Logged
"Now, if I had to make the choice of one fighter aircraft above all the others...it would be, without any doubt, the world's greatest propeller driven flying machine - the magnificent and immortal Spitfire."
Lt. Col. William R. Dunn
flew Spitfires, Hurricanes, P-51s, P-47s, and F-4s

Offline IrishOne

  • Silver Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1528
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #16 on: July 26, 2010, 06:08:20 PM »
chuck norris is the first person to ever punch someone in the back of the face.

chuck norris once visited the virgin islands.  now they just call them the islands.
Logged
-AoM-

Offline Becinhu

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2633
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #17 on: July 26, 2010, 06:39:27 PM »
Chuck Norris carries a third fist in his beard.
Logged
412th Braunco Mustangs OG
412th FNVG FSO
80th FS "Headhunters" MA

Offline jimson

  • AvA Staff Member
  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7202
      • The Axis vs Allies Arena
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #18 on: July 26, 2010, 08:45:39 PM »
When all else fails, Chuck Norris doesn't.
Logged

Offline MachFly

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 6296
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #19 on: July 26, 2010, 09:32:28 PM »
A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Logged
"Now, if I had to make the choice of one fighter aircraft above all the others...it would be, without any doubt, the world's greatest propeller driven flying machine - the magnificent and immortal Spitfire."
Lt. Col. William R. Dunn
flew Spitfires, Hurricanes, P-51s, P-47s, and F-4s

Offline redwing7

  • Copper Member
  • **
  • Posts: 288
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #20 on: July 26, 2010, 09:59:10 PM »
Anyone else remember one of the early episodes of Conan O'brian with Chuck Norris as a guest?

Conan asked Chuck if he could really kick like 20 peoples azzes at once like in his movies, Chuck said no nobody can.
Conan says; so if me and the audiance rush you we could kick your azz?
Chuck says, sure (then he got a little smirk and said) but I sure feel sorry for the first 3 or 4 of ya!! :rofl
Logged
THUNDER MOB

"and when they bury me, may it be face down...so all my critics can kiss my ass!"  Bobby Knight

Offline Blooz

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3841
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #21 on: July 26, 2010, 10:00:22 PM »
Chuck Norris can get blood out of a stone.


Step on a crack and Chuck Norris breaks your back!
Logged
White 9
JG11 Sonderstaffel

"You can't vote your way out of communism."

Offline fudgums

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3873
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #22 on: July 26, 2010, 10:09:36 PM »
Chuck Norris is 1/16th Cherokee Indian, not because of genetics, because he ate a frieken indian.

Chuck Norris says no to drugs, if he said yes, it would collapse Columbia's infrastructure.

Helen Kellers favorite color is Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once pulled a hair from his beard, only to skewer a mans heart out with it.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity- twice.
Logged
"Masters of the Air" Scenario - JG27

Offline fbWldcat

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2970
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #23 on: July 26, 2010, 10:59:04 PM »
Contrary to popular belief, first there was Chuck Norris, then there was nothing.

Chuck Norris once had a staring contest with his own reflection, needless to say, he won.

Chuck Norris only allows the Dos Equis man to survive because of two reasons.
1. He loves beer
and
2. The foreigners need a version of their own Chuck Norris.
Logged
Quote from: Shuffler on April 07, 2011, 10:37:33 AM
Landing is overrated.
"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I: I took the one less traveled by." - Robert Frost
"Uncommon valor was a common virtue." <S>

Offline grizz441

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7000
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #24 on: July 27, 2010, 11:34:06 AM »
Chuck Norris is currently sueing NBC, claiming that "Law" and "Order", are trademarked names of his left and right legs.
Logged

Offline BnZs

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4207
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #25 on: July 27, 2010, 12:38:11 PM »
Chuck Norris will HO you. From BEHIND.

Chuck Norris will pick you. While *he* is AFK.

Chuck Norris once landed 27 kills flying a D3A1. In FSX!
« Last Edit: July 27, 2010, 12:44:37 PM by BnZs »
Logged
"Crikey, sir. I'm looking forward to today. Up diddly up, down diddly down, whoops, poop, twiddly dee - decent scrap with the fiendish Red Baron - bit of a jolly old crash landing behind enemy lines - capture, torture, escape, and then back home in time for tea and medals."

Offline 68ZooM

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 6337
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #26 on: July 27, 2010, 01:01:17 PM »
There is no theory of evolution, it's only the animals Chuck Norris let live
Logged
UrSelf...Pigs On The Wing...Retired

Quote from: hitech on May 02, 2013, 04:20:22 PM
Was me, I bumped a power cord. HiTEch

Offline fbWldcat

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2970
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #27 on: July 27, 2010, 02:24:34 PM »
Chuck Norris is the cause of more deaths than lightning, sharks, airline accidents, Africanized honeybee attacks and bear attacks combined.
Logged
Quote from: Shuffler on April 07, 2011, 10:37:33 AM
Landing is overrated.
"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I: I took the one less traveled by." - Robert Frost
"Uncommon valor was a common virtue." <S>

Offline hymijr

  • Zinc Member
  • *
  • Posts: 45
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #28 on: July 27, 2010, 02:58:17 PM »
most kids can pee their name into the snow, chuck can pee his into concrete.
Logged

Offline morfiend

  • AH Training Corps
  • Plutonium Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 10396
Re: Norris'ism
« Reply #29 on: July 27, 2010, 04:39:53 PM »
Chuck Norris decieded which came first,the chicken or the egg,and he's not telling!
Logged
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4 5 ... 8   Go Up
« previous next »