Getting rid of my demon - whole computer - runs this game max at 60fps

[TnDep]

I got my 2nd appointment Monday....my wife will not go....I have to think about me now as hard as that is

[Hamltnblue]

You know right now anything that was associated with her ie games, computer, my bed, this house just makes me want to throw up.  I don't know why I just want everything to be new in my life besides my kids.  I don't remember having that many issues with you just the few muppet thing going on... I appreciate it I talked to one of my old high school girls tonight for a hour, shes got a 20 month old and daddy left so I'm thinking I might slide in... I love kids I got 2 shes got 1 heck we'll probably have another lol

Hmmm.  Coincidence that the high school girl suddenly showed up in the picture?
Whatever is going on, it has nothing to do with the computer. I would take a step back, don't act desperate (to avoid the restraining order) and go one step at a time.
Participating in your hobby (aces high), will help take your mind off of things.
Don't get rid of the computer because if the child support and/or alimony hit, you won't be able to afford a new one.

Just remember you're not the first or last this has happened to, and how you act/react will determine if you get to wear your uniform.
Good Luck.

[Getback]

I agree with most TnDep. You are doing the right thing. However, remember it takes two. That doesn't mean just you. It's you and her! I would suggest getting a hobby or an activity that you can share like hiking.

Anyway I'm certainly no marriage counselor and I wish you well no matter the outcome. Hang in there.

[TnDep]

outcome not good I talked to her today for 20 minute and again nothings changed...she just don't love me no more and I asked again if there was another man and she said no I believe her or she'd filed a month ago.  I'm filing paperwork in the morning now to get over the heart break I can't quit crying, I do still love her any advise on that would be good...I need to go have fun I guess

I ended my listing on ebay I'm keeping the computer just so I'll have a good one instead of a laptop.

[SilverZ06]

outcome not good I talked to her today for 20 minute and again nothings changed...she just don't love me no more and I asked again if there was another man and she said no I believe her or she'd filed a month ago.  I'm filing paperwork in the morning now to get over the heart break I can't quit crying, I do still love her any advise on that would be good...I need to go have fun I guess

I ended my listing on ebay I'm keeping the computer just so I'll have a good one instead of a laptop.

I'm sorry of the out come so far but you will be ok. I can't imagine what you are going though as I have not been there yet (and hope to never). Just try to keep your head up. We (AH community) are here if you ever need to talk. You are making the right decision keeping the computer. Try to go out and hang with some friends to clear your mind. Best of luck to you and your situation 

[cattb]

outcome not good I talked to her today for 20 minute and again nothings changed...she just don't love me no more and I asked again if there was another man and she said no I believe her or she'd filed a month ago.  I'm filing paperwork in the morning now to get over the heart break I can't quit crying, I do still love her any advise on that would be good...I need to go have fun I guess

I ended my listing on ebay I'm keeping the computer just so I'll have a good one instead of a laptop.

Thats a nice puter Dep, should last for many years.

[guncrasher]

tndep  i know how you feel as I been there myself.  point is live and learn.  but dont blame yourself.  come back and play, you will always have friends here.  and out there ,there 's a girl for you. 

semp

[jimson]

I'm so sorry TnDep. Still loving her isn't something you can turn off like a faucet, but she's not even on the fence.

My advice is easier said than done but do it as much as you possibly can.

Have no contact with her whatsoever. Try to drop the kids at her folks house or something. Don't drive by her work or house or anything. Never call her. Just refuse to have anything to do with her. Don't help her when she needs her car fixed etc, just don't do anything but for yourself and your kids.

Continue with counseling. Get with your medical doctor and do some anti depression therapy, sleeping pills, whatever you need.

Make an effort to improve or maintain your physical health, exercise more etc, that will help a lot.

When you start getting inside your head about her, just THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE.

I know, easier said than done but it gets easier with practice.

You are a wise man, already getting the help you need. That will give you an advantage over everyone who tries to do it on their own, and you will get better sooner.

Hang in there Bud, better days are ahead.

[Midway]

  Time heals all wounds.

Focus on work and fun.   

[Masherbrum]

I'm so sorry TnDep. Still loving her isn't something you can turn off like a faucet, but she's not even on the fence.

My advice is easier said than done but do it as much as you possibly can.

Have no contact with her whatsoever. Try to drop the kids at her folks house or something. Don't drive by her work or house or anything. Never call her. Just refuse to have anything to do with her. Don't help her when she needs her car fixed etc, just don't do anything but for yourself and your kids.

Continue with counseling. Get with your medical doctor and do some anti depression therapy, sleeping pills, whatever you need.

Make an effort to improve or maintain your physical health, exercise more etc, that will help a lot.

When you start getting inside your head about her, just THINK OF SOMETHING ELSE.

I know, easier said than done but it gets easier with practice.

You are a wise man, already getting the help you need. That will give you an advantage over everyone who tries to do it on their own, and you will get better sooner.

Hang in there Bud, better days are ahead.

TnDep, I know you and I haven't exactly been "friendly" over the years in AH.    But Jimson echoes pretty much everything I was going to say.   In the end, you have to try and provide for your kids as much as you can.   Just try to be the best father you can.   

Also, if you ever wish to discuss further, feel free to PM me your digits and I will try to assist you as well.   Whatever you do, DO NOT LEAVE YOUR HOUSE, continue living there.   Once "you leave", the Courts will say have "Abandoned your Children" and it will cause some issues down the road.   Just go with the flow until the courts help you avoid that "issue", even if it means you completely ignore her.    My brother thanks me for that every time I see him.    His wife left him after 16 years of marriage and two kids.    He stuck with it and lived with his kids until it the divorce was almost finalized.   

[pervert]

outcome not good I talked to her today for 20 minute and again nothings changed...she just don't love me no more and I asked again if there was another man and she said no I believe her or she'd filed a month ago.  I'm filing paperwork in the morning now to get over the heart break I can't quit crying, I do still love her any advise on that would be good...I need to go have fun I guess

I ended my listing on ebay I'm keeping the computer just so I'll have a good one instead of a laptop.

And she won't be back mate, hate to say it but I don't think the game was the problem perhaps it was a side effect wanting to distract yourself. I know thats not what you want to hear right now, think in all break ups you go through these stages, one day you'll look back and realise it wasn't as good as you thought it was. Things just work or they don't theres a chemistry between 2 people keeps them together not a list of right and wrong things to do within reason of course  playing Aces High isn't in the same ball park as say sleeping with her best friend is it?

I can remember how I got into Aces High, my eldest was 1 year old and me and the girl had moved in but Aces High was a welcome distraction to the arguments and kept us out of each others hair so it was bareable 

Something you enjoy doing is a necessity now more than ever, I don't think the game was to blame, and no HTC aren't paying me to say this.

[Melvin]

playing Aces High isn't in the same ball park as say sleeping with her best friend is it?

Keep yer chin up fella and don't let the skirt drag you down. Be strong. If not for yourself, then for the children.

[TnDep]

good advise all....Give me a few months to adjust I may be back to play I don't know I need to focus on getting out more....Jimson that was good advise on the no contact I will do that except dropping off the kids and picking them up I'm just going to have to be strong in those instances.  Last night I got 3 1/2 hours sleep with 2 sleeping aid pills I'm going to have to get something stronger. 

Mashburn, My wife left the house over a month ago, we've been swapping the kids out I got them yesterday and I'll have them today and tomorrow then they'll go back to her tomorrow night and I'll get them again Friday night.  As far as the kids go shes worked with me so I guess it could be worse. 

[jimson]

There will come a time when you will be OK dealing with her, but for now, do as much as you can to avoid it.

You have been injured emotionally, and just like a broken bone, that needs to heal up a bit.

Get with your doc and get some prescription meds temporarily.

Start a rigorous work out program. The benefits of this will be surprising. You will get an endorphin release and feel better and that will help you a bunch mentally.

[TnDep]

There will come a time when you will be OK dealing with her, but for now, do as much as you can to avoid it.

You have been injured emotionally, and just like a broken bone, that needs to heal up a bit.

Get with your doc and get some prescription meds temporarily.

Start a rigorous work out program. The benefits of this will be surprising. You will get an endorphin release and feel better and that will help you a bunch mentally.

Your very wise Jimson ty I will do.