what do you do to get back at your wife?

[Mother]

As Narsus' roomate I can attest to his statements. He has been using this technique as long as i've known him and has never been pulled away from a good dogfight in all that time. He has successfully controlled sex for at least a year that I know of, and I might add my stock in marcal tissues and jergens hand lotion have never been better.

[Rude]

My wifey tells me to kick tail when I fly...she know's that I'm alot more fun to be around when I have successful sorties:)

The others are right on....submit to one another and you won't have problems. Some men and women can't seem to figure that out, which in those cases, it won't be AH that causes your marriage to suffer.

[narsus]

LOL

[fd ski]

muck, first one to ask - losses

[Kratzer]

If a guy and his wife have a relationship where they need to 'get back' at each other, it seems to me that they have some relationship and boundary issues.

Sure, you are married, but you are two different people, and you do different things.  The only problem is not thinking that is okay.

[samu1]

Just don't get married, and if you already are. Haha you're F*cked

At least that's what my dad and grandad keep tellin me

[Sandman]

Oh... and if your wife hasn't already discovered Dr. Phil, look here.

He's on Oprah all the time and most of the women I've talked to love him.

This pretty much sums up what he said that made my life a whole lot easier, "If you think you have a problem in your marriage, you are the problem."

The important thing is that my wife didn't hear it coming from me.

Lastly... This topic is SO very very OT.

[AvidMC]

Leave it to a Luftwaffle to turn this into a therapy session. Is it time for a group hug, or prozac!!!:D

Avid

[Rooster]

Just a wee story about loyalty in marriage.

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.

As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what?  You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side...
You know what?"

What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.

"I think you're bad luck, why don't you f*ck off.

[funkedup]

Fart

[CavemanJ]

Originally posted by TheOxman
The power of the "P" brother...power of the "P"
I am recently married, and i am damn lucky she anit cut the account off already. The only REAL thing u have control is the sex. Give it up if you must, but cut her off if shes pissin you off. Yes,, yes you WILL hear squeakin' but that's the game of marrage. give and take, or sometimes it's just give,give.

You can't cut her off, you don't know where she's getting it.  And sometimes yer better off not knowing.  Trust me.

Muck hit the nail on the head with his post

One thing I like to do to totally irritate my wife is rearrange her Mary Kay closest.  Since she sells the stuff she keeps a fair amount of stuff on hand.  I just wander into the closest while she's sleeping or out of the house and rearrange everything

Course there's always the old grudge f*ck.  Pop the wrong hole while yer goin wide open >=)  Then ya can tell'er it was an accident.  Get revenge and not get blamed for getting revenge
Gonna have to go dig up the old Sam Kinneson tapes now.. one of them has a bit about this that's hilarious

[Flossy]

Originally posted by Cherlie
Just being recently married, any advise on how to get back at the nagging wife?

Get back at her?  Not recommended.  I suppose when Zeb first started playing Air Warrior online, I did nag a bit, as I was concerned about the high phone bills we were racking up.... I often asked "are you online?" to be told he "wouldn't be long"...    

What Zeb did was get me interested in the game myself.... slowly at first, but gradually adding more snippets of information.  I think what made the biggest impact was when he told me he might be joining a squad - it was then I realised there was more to this thing than I had originally thought.  I found myself watching him more often, in fact frequently asked if he was "going on" tonight.  Eventually, I got my own account - I had my own PC anyway - and the rest is history!  

[muckmaw]

I say every time she squeakes, Give her the ol' "Stinky Pinky"!

And if that does'nt work, try the "Dirty Sanchez".

[midnight Target]

Seems like an appropriate place to post this link

Best of Air Warrior Widows.......thanks Dawwgus

Oldies but goodies.

[AKDejaVu]

Yep.. still a classic:

Darling,

I'm posting this message in your newsgroup as I know this is the only way to get it to you since flight simulation entered our lives two years ago.

The children are doing well. Our son is seven now and is a bright and handsome boy. He has developed quite a flair for art. He drew a family portrait for a school project. All the figures were good, but yours was excellent. The computer, the model airplane, the chair, and the back of your head are rendered with stunning detail and accuracy. You would be very proud of him.

As you'll recall our precious little girl turned three in September. She still remembers that you spent the whole day with her on her birthday. What quality time it was for her when you allowed her to watch you re-enact Amelia Earhart's last flight! She was sorry that she crashed before your plane did, but she was *so* sleepy. Poor thing. When she asked how come Daddy's TV only had a grey picture, I told her you were staring at fog. Was I right?

I am also doing well. I went blonde about a year ago and was delighted to find out that blondes really do have more fun.

Lars, I mean Mr. Swenson, the department head, has taken an interest in my career and has become a good friend to all of us.

The house is in good shape. I had the living room painted last Spring. I'm not sure if you noticed it. I made sure the painters cut air holes in the dropcloths so you wouldn't be disturbed. They were very apologetic about splattering your charts.

I've discovered that the household chores are much easier since you allow me to vacuum around you instead of using the feather duster that makes you sneeze and also streaks your goggles.

I will be at the ski lodge this weekend with Lars and the kids. But don't worry, darling, we have separate bedrooms, and he is well aware that I am married. I will try to call you, but if the line is busy, then I'll know that you are connected by modem with your flight instructor who is demonstrating advanced manuevers. (I still can't believe he's only thirteen! His parents must be as proud of him as I am of you.)

The housekeeper has been instructed to keep your coffee cup filled and to give you a fresh straw every three hours. Just let her know when you're getting hungry and she'll give you some frozen pizza to suck on.

Good luck circumnavigating the world via the poles! Should be a fun weekend! See you Sunday night!

Fondly,

Carol (Your wife)