Yeah Holden,
The first day is pretty wild what with all the airliners crashing all over the place, aircraft carrier smashing into the Golden Gate bridge, oil tankers running aground.. a real barrow of laughs.
Okay fine, you drive down to the store in your Bradley Fighting vehicle (you can’t be too careful on account of the massive over population of anacondas and sabre-tooth tigers running around) to pick up some canned goods.. anything that hasn't been trashed by the animals.. and your foot slips into a small crevasse.. a sprained ankle.. no biggie.. just walk it off.. Three days later your foot is three times it’s size and you have a 105 temp and your foot is turning yellowish green.. as in gangrene. You must amputate your own leg to save your life.
It worked.. you were able to apply a tourniquet before passing out from the pain so you didn’t loose all your blood. After a few days your able to fashion a peg leg from a sabre tooth..
Weeks pass. One night your fiddling around with your solar powered short wave like you do every night, to hear if anybody’s out there.. the endless bottles of Crown Royal doesn’t seem to do the trick anymore, there’s a limit to just how drunk you can get..
Suddenly there’s a faint SOS..
Now Nash said everybody is gone from Earth.. he didn’t say anything about the International space station.. They’re still there!!.. three French guys and a Russian babe.. seems their soyuz space capsule got stuck.. and they have no way back.. It’s up to you to travel to the Houston space center, set up a down link with them.. ask them how one goes about launching the shuttle.. They tell you to travel to Florida, find the shuttle, use a crane to place it on that bigass tractor.. sucker only goes 4 mph.. can’t it go any faster?!!.. Next, take that other bigass crane.. lift the boosters onto the launch pad.. attach shuttle.. full her up with rocket fuel... hobble over to the control center... read manual.. (quickly), set launch sequence for 20 minutes.. hobble back onto the tower.. take the elevator up..(hurry!!).. strap yer self in an’ light that candle!.. Did you forget the manual?.. you Idiot!.. now how are you gonna link up with the space station?..
OK OK.. amazingly.. incredibly.. you manage to link up with the station.. all aboard you leave for the return trip to earth.. Only one problem... you forgot to pick up the three French dudes.. You Idiot!.. Oh well.. we all make mistakes.. time to move on.