Three amusing situations recently happened to me.
#1. Since I'm not very good at AH I tend to fly planes that are fast and BnZ an awful lot. My SA just sucks, so turn fighting gets me dead real quick. Anyway, up in a Runstang with only 25% (field fuel porked as usual) and head off for what appears to be a good fight over an enemy (Bish or Rook, can't remember) field about 1.5 sectors away. Climb out to 10K plus.
Arriving over the field there is a good Knight vs. Bish/Rook fight going on at about 5K, with fairly even numbers. Most of the fight is concentrated over or around the field, but a Knight Spit and an enemy LA7 are off to the side a bit going around and around in circles. LA7 is gaining the advantage, and finally latches on to the Spits tail at maybe 1.2 out. Spit and LA7 are coming towards me, my 10 o'clock or so.
Always being the one to help out a friend, I dive in on their 1v1 fight with the original idea of just forcing the LA7 to break off the Spit (i.e., fire a couple of tracers his way). Turns out that after my dive I end up on his 9:30 or so, 350 out, so I let him have it. Stitched the plane from cowl to tail as he goes by, and get a quick kill. Zooming back up I get a message on channel 1 to the effect of:
1. I HO'd him and that wasn't "fair" - Sorry, thought HO was at 12:00, but anyway.
2. I "ruined" his fight with the Spit.
#2. Fuel was low, and make awful gunnery soon depleted by ammo load within a couple of minutes following #1 above. So I gain some alt. and start heading back at maybe 10K, with one "tick" on the fuel tank and maybe 100-175 rounds of .50 cal. Along comes an LA7 at my 12:00 o'clock, at 15K or so, heading right at me. I keep on eye on him, but I don't have the fuel or ammo to fight so I immediately decide that I will run if he engages, knowing that a good pilot will be good in the merge, and I'm probably dead anyway.
LA7 dives in, tries an HO (started firing at 1.0!!!!). I roll to evade and dive for the deck. He must have burned a lot of E in his reversal because he isn't gaining on me. I keep checking my 6 to see how far out he is, and it slowly, very slowly starts counting down from 1.6. It gets to 1.3 and then starts opening up again. At 2.2, a message comes over channel 1:
1. I wasted his time/fuel/whatever because I wouldn't engage. True enough, but not sure why he kept chasing me for 5 minutes. The only option I may have had to "engage" would have been an HO/ram, at which point I'm sure I would have heard another comment.
#3. Start a co-alt fight with a F4U in my Runstang. We go on and about for maybe a minute or so in what was actually a pretty good 1v1 fight. I resist the temptation to HO him, and he does the same, so I figure we have a gentlemen's agreement for this fight and that we are going to play "fair". Neither of us really gets any good shots throughout, but on one merge he comes right at me and starts spraying from 800 or so. And misses. Next merge same thing. And misses. Again. And misses. During all of this I continue to abide by what I thought was our gentlemen's agreement, and I don't return fire head on. On the next merge I see 2 of his buddies show up, 4.5 out and closing. He comes at me again head on and fires. This time I fire back, gets some hits, check my six, and see a chute. Channel 1 reveals:
1. Something to the effect of "Nice HO 51...try some ACM next time."
Huh?