Listen mate, best thing you can do is get a new name and afresh start in here, fly for a different chess piece and stay out of squads and scores for a while.
You'll also have to bury that other piece of your charachter or learn how to be a man my friend. Like folks say, this could have been nipped in the bud earlier when this was first raised and maybe the few would have kept you? Would have dead and buried by now.
But more Important, you will at some point in your life have to stand for something and do the right thing, happens to us all at somepoint. I just hope that you learn from this, look yourself in the mirror, fix it with the few and learn to be a man.