Originally posted by Siaf__csf
Conagher as I was saying it's better to read about it than experience it. A 7-year old is clearly in an age that parental supervision is needed. The situation is way different when we talk about teenagers though.
If a child is curious and wants information, I think it's dead wrong to deny that just because of a social standard dating to the victorian times. We're all born naked and if someone thinks that it's damaging to see a naked body.. well they're far off the mark.
The point is to be honest to your child and tell things the way they are. In your case I'd tell the 7-year old that the mister next door is a very evil man and the child should avoid any contact with him on all times. I'd even tell her that the person hurts small children. With a 7-year old it's perfectly natural to monitor the activities also since the kid clearly has no practical sense.
I however would _not_ read the e-mail of a 17-year old or spy on thier internet activities. Teenagers are old enough to take responsibility for thier own actions - and they're old enough to have privacy of thier own. If they have been told the realities of the life, they come prepared for all the filth and sickoes out there.
You got things mixed up big time, either by mistake or on purpose.
I agree with the top portion of your post here somewhat.
You don't need to get elaborate with your answers to a young child. Teenagers you have to be tell them like it is.
As far as reading the e-mail of my 17year old. Well if i thought he/she was getting into trouble I would in a heartbeat.
They're not responsible for there own actions untill they're 18years old. Then they can have at it as long as they're not in my house and still being supported by me as in paying for school. so on...
At 18years old and if they are supporting themselves then All I can do is give unsolicited adive they can take or leave then.
Then all the moral values you taught them come into play.
Don't think that when there teenagers they know what there doing. Far from it thats when they need you the most, because that when they can really get into trouble.
OH just because they have been told doesn't mean they took it to heart or that they actually listened to you. Since you are the old man the authority figure. Keep on eye on your kids even though they seem responsible. if they're not 18 yrs old they're not you are! Unless the laws in your country are different.
ASK WHO WHAT WERE AND WITH WHOM. even then keep an eye on them. Your the only thing keeping them from harm.
Privacy well thats for adults. Give your teenagers the illusion of privacy.
I don't know about you but did you ever lie to your parents. Teenagers are alway trying to push the envelope. It's up to you rein them in.