Author Topic: Reason I hav'nt been on lately  (Read 1422 times)

Offline eskimo2

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #45 on: October 20, 2006, 04:19:42 PM »
I think you stand a reasonable chance.  Figure out or recall what turns her on.  Work it hard but don’t show desperation; show confidence and happiness.  Exercise more and get in better shape.  Shower and shave more; dress better.

storch

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #46 on: October 20, 2006, 04:22:25 PM »
what GE said.  sometimes you just have to say don't let the door hit you in the bellybutton on the way out.  it works.

Offline wrag

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« Reply #47 on: October 20, 2006, 06:11:18 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by lazs2
not to make light of it but..  The first divorce is the hardest.

If you have to change to much about yourself in order to keep her... it won't work..  you will resent having to do so and it will show eventually.

women also work on a different clock... when they feel the blush coming off the rose they get a little desperate...  they figure they better get busy if they aren't absolutely happy in evey respect... they want to catch mr right before gravity catches them.

lazs


I find myself pretty much in agreement with Laz on this.

Claim is that it's the females that start divorces most often in most countries.

Silly really, or at least IMHO it is, IMO they've been programmed by the womens libers and the media to think that they must be HAPPY all the time.  So romance, gifts, and constant special treatment SEEM to be required for American females now.  Or it's bye-bye time.  And the way the courts SEEM to work they're taking allot with them.  Not saying all are this way by any means.

Wasn't that long ago when being content was sufficent.  There are still quite a few that SEEM to look at life and living with a, IMO, more realistic view.  Happy your on the computer playing a game rather then out drinkin with the guys etc.  Happy you care about them and show and tell em from time to time, and don't require attention ALL the time.

I sometimes find myself wondering which is wiser?

Read somewhere that the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish woman plucks it down with her own hands.

Oh well......................... .....  best of luck to you both on this ............
It's been said we have three brains, one cobbled on top of the next. The stem is first, the reptilian brain; then the mammalian cerebellum; finally the over developed cerebral cortex.  They don't work together in awfully good harmony - hence ax murders, mobs, and socialism.

Offline DREDIOCK

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #48 on: October 20, 2006, 07:34:50 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by lasersailor184
[SIZE=8]NO![/SIZE] Bad Rip!  Bad!


The moment either of you leave the house (I.E. Move out for trial seperation) it is known as abandonement in the court system.  The person who is abandoned then gets to butt rape the other person in the divorce.


What ever you do, don't move out.  Ever.  Even if you're on the brink of killing her.  

Of course, it's OK if SHE moves out.  Nothing wrong about that, right?  :aok


the man is right.
I have received the same advise from someone with a bunch of letters along with his name
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It ain't pretty

storch

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #49 on: October 20, 2006, 07:42:24 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by wrag
I find myself pretty much in agreement with Laz on this.

Claim is that it's the females that start divorces most often in most countries.

Silly really, or at least IMHO it is, IMO they've been programmed by the womens libers and the media to think that they must be HAPPY all the time.  So romance, gifts, and constant special treatment SEEM to be required for American females now.  Or it's bye-bye time.  And the way the courts SEEM to work they're taking allot with them.  Not saying all are this way by any means.

Wasn't that long ago when being content was sufficent.  There are still quite a few that SEEM to look at life and living with a, IMO, more realistic view.  Happy your on the computer playing a game rather then out drinkin with the guys etc.  Happy you care about them and show and tell em from time to time, and don't require attention ALL the time.

I sometimes find myself wondering which is wiser?

Read somewhere that the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish woman plucks it down with her own hands.

Oh well......................... .....  best of luck to you both on this ............
 very true.  I don't get my wife anything for christmas, her birthday, mother's day,  none of the designated special days.  this started entirely accidentally early on in our relationship.  when she howled because I forgot some significant day and my response was I don't believe any one day is any more significant than another.  in time as I came across good deals I'd get her stuff and say here happy thursday.  it has worked out real well for us, she tells her friends she likes the "surprise christmas present" much better.  I still get her stuff though, I like to.  it makes me feel more providerly.

Offline Flit

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« Reply #50 on: October 20, 2006, 07:43:45 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Gunthr
Eskimo, please don't project your personal problems on Flit; the guy has enough to deal with right now... .  I suggest that you yourself would probably be happier if you get a personal trainer, a dietician and a hygeneist.   Thank you.

 lol -what he said, I'm not in bad shape by all means, I own and run a Karate school:D

storch

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« Reply #51 on: October 20, 2006, 07:47:36 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Flit
lol -what he said, I'm not in bad shape by all means, I own and run a Karate school:D
wow.  tough row to hoe but very rewarding in other than financial considerations.  what style?

Offline DREDIOCK

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #52 on: October 20, 2006, 07:50:08 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Recap
Been there done that.  Knew things could have been better and would have worked on things if told she wasn't happy.  Some people are so conflict avoident that they would rather just ignore the problem until it's too late.  Atleast yours didnt just up and one day call you on the phone and say she wanted a divorce and to be out of the house by noon the next day.  Best thing that ever happened to me though.  Hang in there, it's hell, but gets a lot better.


p.s.  spending all your time on the computer means you weren't happy either


I will never understand why when the woman out of the blue says she wants out. Why its the man who leaves.

Screw dat.
I was told that she "didnt think she wanted to be married anymore" and that she thought  I "should leave"

My responce. "You want out. You leave. But you leave alone. I dont see why if you want out. I should be the one that gives up everything."

Screw that. She wants out. Let her leave

Seems to me the person that wants out should be the one to leave.
Death is no easy answer
For those who wish to know
Ask those who have been before you
What fate the future holds
It ain't pretty

Offline DREDIOCK

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« Reply #53 on: October 20, 2006, 08:08:00 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Flit
The thing that really bugs me is the "I want a trial separation" followed by the "how should we divide our assets". That to me seems to indicate that she has made up her mind. All I can do is continue to love her and hope the spark comes back.
  Thanks for all the good wishes, it does make a difference !


women. No offence to the women here.
Really its more of a compliment.
While they often do tricval things on the spur of the moment
Women tend to think major issues through moreso then men. Particularly life changing issues.
They plot and plan.
that is why when women cheat they rarely get caught.
Because they have everything planned out to the last detail before they ever do it.
Where as men. do it, then think about covering their tracks affterwards.
Or men will decide to do something then worry about taking care of the details as they go along

Not that that has anything to do with whats going on here.
The fact she asked you about how to divide your assets doesnt really suprise me. She probably has been thinking of it for a while.

the fact she is willing to seek counceling is a good sign.
Make use of it.

You wioll proably be asked about each others concerns. (complaints)
Dont be afraid to vice them. and dont be afraid to listen either.
Typically what happens is the counceler will ask if you can do this that or the other thing to address her concerns. and her to do the same till the next time you all meet.
Do your part. Then pay attention. without saying anything to her one way or the other if she does the same.
You can tell alot by her actions how serious she is about getting help.
But take a fair look and dont look for absolute perfection.
IF you do that and all you see is a no, or only a half hearted effort on her part. then you know she is only going through the motions just so she can say "she tried"

but keep seeking help so long as she is willing.
Even if it doesnt help her. or you two as a pair. it may end up helping you
Death is no easy answer
For those who wish to know
Ask those who have been before you
What fate the future holds
It ain't pretty

Offline eskimo2

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #54 on: October 20, 2006, 08:08:51 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Flit
lol -what he said, I'm not in bad shape by all means, I own and run a Karate school:D


LOL, my bad.  I made a general assumption about 45 year old men.  Good for you!

Offline DREDIOCK

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« Reply #55 on: October 20, 2006, 08:24:58 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Flit
BTW- I can't seem to remember how to change my sig- a little help please ?
 It seem that all of this has brought the sensitive writer/artist in me, and I would like to share some gushy Hiakus ;)


Dude. I know your going through a rough time of it and all
But do somethign else with your sig.
You a little old to be turning into a flowerchild ;)
Death is no easy answer
For those who wish to know
Ask those who have been before you
What fate the future holds
It ain't pretty

Offline Eagler

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #56 on: October 20, 2006, 09:55:04 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by storch
wow.  tough row to hoe but very rewarding in other than financial considerations.  what style?

storch-fu
death by smack talk :)
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Offline Flit

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« Reply #57 on: October 20, 2006, 10:55:36 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by storch
wow.  tough row to hoe but very rewarding in other than financial considerations.  what style?

Korean Karate

Offline Flit

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« Reply #58 on: October 20, 2006, 11:00:08 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by DREDIOCK
Dude. I know your going through a rough time of it and all
But do somethign else with your sig.
You a little old to be turning into a flowerchild ;)

 Is this any better ? lol

Offline IgnorantJoe

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Reason I hav'nt been on lately
« Reply #59 on: October 20, 2006, 11:22:29 PM »
Isn't this ironic?