Author Topic: How do you protect (Read 2438 times)

storch · « **Reply #45 on:** January 10, 2005, 05:12:08 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by wombatt
Then they have to deal with a couple of 120lb Akita's swinging from there testicles.

or worse the never ending questions asked by a three year old.

midnight Target · « **Reply #46 on:** January 10, 2005, 05:14:45 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by storch
or worse the never ending questions asked by a three year old.

Sadist!

lazs2 · « **Reply #47 on:** January 11, 2005, 08:39:29 AM »

"I have relatives and friends in the Triads. Guns, dogs, alarms, martial arts, weight-lifting, living in gated communities and the rest of that paranoid paraphenalia are just crutches for the socially inept. Get connected"

reminds me of the guys a few decades ago who used to claim they had biker friends.

Criminals don't have friends as such. You are better off them not knowing that you exist rather than having them think you think you are their "friend".

and wombat.. gated community? alarms? aren't you talking about jail?

lazs

lasersailor184 · « **Reply #48 on:** January 11, 2005, 09:20:05 AM »

You could take the French Martial Arts class. It'll save you a lot of trouble.

I'll describe one move. First, stand there easily balanced with your feet shoulder width apart. Don't make any really fast movements.

Now, Raise your right arm all the way above your head. Then raise your left arm all the way above your head. Now hold...

Jackal1 · « **Reply #49 on:** January 11, 2005, 09:28:35 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by lazs2

and wombat.. gated community? alarms? aren't you talking about jail?

lazs

Man, them places are the "IN" place to be. Dontcha realize that?
Where else can you pay four prices for something and have all of your decisions made for you. Decisions like what kind and type, even what style of home you are allowed to have there, even in some instances what color. What type fence, height, and if it`s a privacy fence, what the fence can be constructed with, even down to the choice of wood. What type BBQ pit..style, construction and where it is located on "Your" property. If and where you may park your vehicle on "your" property and what type vehicle is allowed on "your" property. Who and when visitors are allowed.
On a lot of these places around here you get the opportunity to pay around four times the average rate to store your boat because you can`t keep one in "your" garage on "your" property.
Most have a limit on how many visitors may be parked at any particular time, so your not bothered with them pesky family reunions or the lame bunch of friends who might want to have a cookout/party at "your" place. There great I tell you.
The neat thing about them, in most cases, is after all the property is sold for these "private" residents within a couple of years you get to watch the "gated entrance" become obsolete and you find that street/road repair is the responsibilty of you and your community instead of the development company who`s board of directors by this time have disapeared. After all it`s "your" property.
Professional burglars love them because no where else can you do your job without outside interference.
You also get bragging rights on the enormous tax bill you get ever year.
Where could you possibly go wrong?

storch · « **Reply #50 on:** January 11, 2005, 09:36:35 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by Jackal1
Man, them places are the "IN" place to be. Dontcha realize that?
Where else can you pay four prices for something and have all of your decisions made for you. Decisions like what kind and type, even what style of home you are allowed to have there, even in some instances what color. What type fence, height, and if it`s a privacy fence, what the fence can be constructed with, even down to the choice of wood. What type BBQ pit..style, construction and where it is located on "Your" property. If and where you may park your vehicle on "your" property and what type vehicle is allowed on "your" property. Who and when visitors are allowed.
On a lot of these places around here you get the opportunity to pay around four times the average rate to store your boat because you can`t keep one in "your" garage on "your" property.
Most have a limit on how many visitors may be parked at any particular time, so your not bothered with them pesky family reunions or the lame bunch of friends who might want to have a cookout/party at "your" place. There great I tell you.
The neat thing about them, in most cases, is after all the property is sold for these "private" residents within a couple of years you get to watch the "gated entrance" become obsolete and you find that street/road repair is the responsibilty of you and your community instead of the development company who`s board of directors by this time have disapeared. After all it`s "your" property.
Professional burglars love them because no where else can you do your job without outside interference.
You also get bragging rights on the enormous tax bill you get ever year.
Where could you possibly go wrong?

you forgot the periodic assessments for all the repairs and the landscaping. the best ones use a "security company" to tell their burglar buddies when you are on vacation.

Jackal1 · « **Reply #51 on:** January 11, 2005, 09:40:28 AM »

OoooooPs! That completely slipped my mind. I`m sure I missed a lot of the benefits.

lazs2 · « **Reply #52 on:** January 11, 2005, 02:38:57 PM »

so.... it's not as good as jail?

I have a buddy in a "gated community" and he is really getting fed up with their rules and regulations. Locked down behind a wall with guards and alarms and told what to do and people pretending to be your friends so that they can steal your stuff...

sounds like prison to me.

lazs

wombatt · « **Reply #53 on:** January 11, 2005, 03:03:56 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by lazs2
so.... it's not as good as jail?

I have a buddy in a "gated community" and he is really getting fed up with their rules and regulations. Locked down behind a wall with guards and alarms and told what to do and people pretending to be your friends so that they can steal your stuff...

sounds like prison to me.

lazs

Laz they tried that crap with me.
you know the home owners associations and the like.

LOL sent me a notice one day that the weeds in my flower bed were to tall LOL.

One phone call is all it took to get these clowns off my back.

I cant tell you what i said cause Scuzzy would ban me LOL.

But needless to say I got my point across that was to leave me the F alone.

I have not heard a peep out of them since.

indy007 · « **Reply #54 on:** January 11, 2005, 03:20:37 PM »

I installed a nice alarm system. Next, I hooked up 8 video cameras to a multiplexer & time-lapse VCR. Then, I installed motion detecting floodlights. I had a "safe room" installed with a discrete entrance. I took advantage of modern positive pressurization systems to keep any toxins out. I cleared all the shrubbery around my house to give myself clean firing lanes. I loaded up my 37mm grenade launcher with flechette rounds and put it next to a loaded Saiga 12 gauge, several .45s loaded with Glaser safety rounds, and a Barret .50cal (in case they run). I hung up my CHL qualifying targets in the windows facing the street. I liberally seeded my lawn with anti-personell mines. I picked up a pair of Caucasian Mountain Dogs, but they have to stay inside or they'll hit mines. Finally, I dug a moat just outside of the mine permiter and filled it with Pirhanas.

storch · « **Reply #55 on:** January 11, 2005, 04:37:57 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by indy007
I installed a nice alarm system. Next, I hooked up 8 video cameras to a multiplexer & time-lapse VCR. Then, I installed motion detecting floodlights. I had a "safe room" installed with a discrete entrance. I took advantage of modern positive pressurization systems to keep any toxins out. I cleared all the shrubbery around my house to give myself clean firing lanes. I loaded up my 37mm grenade launcher with flechette rounds and put it next to a loaded Saiga 12 gauge, several .45s loaded with Glaser safety rounds, and a Barret .50cal (in case they run). I hung up my CHL qualifying targets in the windows facing the street. I liberally seeded my lawn with anti-personell mines. I picked up a pair of Caucasian Mountain Dogs, but they have to stay inside or they'll hit mines. Finally, I dug a moat just outside of the mine permiter and filled it with Pirhanas.

heh, all I did was have my mother in law sit in a rocking chair out front smoking her cigars.

wombatt · « **Reply #56 on:** January 11, 2005, 04:39:08 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by storch
heh, all I did was have my mother in law sit in a rocking chair out front smoking her cigars.

LOL:rofl

indy007 · « **Reply #57 on:** January 11, 2005, 05:36:49 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by storch
heh, all I did was have my mother in law sit in a rocking chair out front smoking her cigars.

I always miss the obvious approaches

Thrawn · « **Reply #58 on:** January 11, 2005, 05:42:22 PM »

I live 1 1/2 blocks from the police station, don't ascociate with criminals and have a foot and half long pig sticker.

-dead- · « **Reply #59 on:** January 11, 2005, 06:02:55 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by lazs2 reminds me of the guys a few decades ago who used to claim they had biker friends.

Criminals don't have friends as such. You are better off them not knowing that you exist rather than having them think you think you are their "friend".

lazs [/B]

I know you're just trying to rationalise your gun fetish as being healthy, normal and useful, but there's really no need to get all uppity when someone suggests it stems from social ineptitude.

Criminals don't have friends as such!? I'm a criminal and I have friends. Perhaps the criminals you've met just don't make good friends with the socially inept.

P.S. The first post was a joke, the second is still tongue-in-cheek. [footnote for the socially inept]